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I'm Very, Very Sorry

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I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Rayla on Wed Dec 31, 2014 5:11 pm

Okay. How do I start this without unintentionally upsetting people? Well, firstly, I'd like to say I am extremely sorry for all I have done. After reviewing all of the stupid and immature things I've done in the pass, I can see why you'd all be angry with me. When I say this I say it honestly: I want to become that submissive, timid, perfectly fine with every situation she's placed in kind of girl. However, I no-longer hold that carefree life. I believe this all started when I left the IceWing throne. I had originally joined this site for its freedom and creativity. I wish It could have stayed that way, but, unfortunately, it hasn't. It has shifted into a strict, untrustworthy site, and I'm afraid this is all my fault.

To recap, when I joined, I was timid and friendly to everyone, ignorant bliss. When I joined the IceWings and became their queen, I felt the responsibility, IC, was too much for Trinyah, so I stepped down. Everything had been nice and dandy from that point on, until disaster struck. You see, I was going through some pretty emotional stuff, and I was getting addicted to this site, which wasn't good for my academic study. I wanted to quit, and I did so the only way I knew how: By killing off a character. I didn't realize until later that it had been the PEOPLE that made this site so hard to quit. I move a lot, so it's very hard to make new friends. This site helped me, since I was able to come home to a positive atmosphere everyday. But, I was too stubborn to see the chaos this would cause.

When I returned, admins and moderators already distrusted me. I took on Rayla's role, but I felt depressed Trinyah had died. This had never happened before, and I didn't understand why. I later learned it had been because of Trinyah's influence and power within the universe of Pyyria. I knew roleplaying the goddess would never be the same again, so I eventually gave up.

I later became the goddess of insanity. I quit for a month, and came back after another emotional breakdown. So I came back. I discovered I had been stripped of my position. This was my own fault for quitting. Even so, try as I must, I could not stop myself from bugging Astral and the other Admins to give me my rank back.

In conclusion, this site is no longer a place I can come to relax. To make matters worst, I was given a warning for no apparent reason other then being informed with incorrect lore. All I was doing was saying what I knew. I believe this is because Astral distrusts me, and thinks I'm trying to change the site.

I have seen obvious distrust from all the site members. No one really respects me as much as they used to. So, this is why I'm apologizing. I apologize for trying to change this site. And I apologize for my stubbornness. I can see if you want to ban me, and that's fine. I'm not quitting, I just, quite truthfully, have a lot of work to do. So I may disappear for long periods of time. But I may return.

If you are reading this, please note I mean no harm to anyone. This is just my interpretation of the whole situation. I am very, very, very sorry for all the harm that has come to this site because of my selfish acts. I hope you can forgive me O^O

-Sincerely, Rayla the Awesome Dragoness of Awesome Baygels.

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Shiningwater on Wed Dec 31, 2014 5:38 pm

Aww...Ray...
I'm sorry to say that I can't relate with much of that, but I've been o here for a while, and I really like you. I like just about everyone on here.
I'm not going to try and tell you this isn't true, because it's your perception and it makes it true, but I'll give you my version if it helps. Smile

I see you as a fun and caring member of the site who wants nothing more than to be helpful and have fun. I see that you have-how did you put it so I don't word this wrong-Emotional stuff going on, and I respect that.
I've seen a few people on this site with almost the same stuff going on in their real life, and I've tried to convince them that this isn't a place meant to hurt them, and that this is a place that likes you.
There are a bunch of people on this site Rayla, and a bunch of that many people has to like you.
I could be-as you put it-ignorantly blissful, but I rather like that if I can come home from school and get away from family life on a place where everyone knows how to cheer you up.
I've been here for longer than you have-I think...pretty sure...-and I can also see that this site has had rules changed, enforced more strictly, or even added, but that doesn't stop me from coming on. It's a fun place to be, despite the changes.
I'm not trying to tell you that you're wrong, because direct contradictions never help, but I'm telling you my side of this story. And if it helps then so be it.
And-if that massive post doesn't help(not trying to sound mean or rude there) then maybe this will: Apology accepted. At least for me.

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Asailia on Wed Dec 31, 2014 9:08 pm

I'm not really big on emotional words, mostly because I never know what to say. I can tell you that if I thought you were irritating, or didn't like you, you would know. I also wouldn't give you snuggles every time I see you. You have nothing to apologize for.

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Akreious on Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:16 pm

Wait your leaving? NOOO!!!!! Sad wait your not? Wait a second... Nah your not, good Very Happy but bad, bad kitty for being too harsh! The kitty of hurt is too much!

Anyways with my upbeat annoying personality on the side, I will say this, I forgive! My upbeat personality fit well with you! And even now I think your personality fits well since I think people got old of my personality after awhile, and you were one of the few people that was still amused (or entertained :/) and I will try everything I can to re-steer DRF To it's glory days of awesome when we had hundreds of members in a day! (Sarcasm) I forgive! I do! Oh and this is a little early for ME but happy New Years!

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Kazumi on Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:33 pm

Trin, it's not your fault. Everyone goes through hard times. I personally think that there's nothing to forgive. But anyways, happy New Year!

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Arkhor on Thu Jan 01, 2015 6:28 am

Thought I better say something Razz

Admittedly at first it did effect me when Trinyah died, and I can say the same for Astral. It didn't cause me to hate you or anything like that, I can understand your feelings about it all. So there is no need to jump up and say I'm sorry, I've only been here since August so I didn't know much back then, even so I don't blame ya. So I forgive you

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Re: I'm Very, Very Sorry

Post by Atlantis on Thu Jan 01, 2015 2:18 pm

I don't have any problems with you, and I have always considered you a friend ^^

I think to understand your interest is to just roleplay and have fun. However you have big expectations and desire to do great things for the site, so you may get disappointed when people don't agree with you. it is normal because people have points of view.

Also, leaving/joining the site continuosly can be frustrating for others, especially because you're an amazing roleplayer and you can easily cover high rank positions.

My suggestion for you is to simply focus on your characters/plots, and don't care so much about the rest ^^

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